WOTR: Misty Mountains/Dol Guldur vs Rhovanion/Noldor

This is really late in the piece but here is a rundown of a four player (I think it was 700 or 750 pts each) bash of WOTR. Three of us were using the totally cool new War of the North lists I've been working on and the fourth had Misty Mountains. Since one of the players doesn't play near as much WOTR as the rest of us, he got the hard as nails Noldor Elves. Since Jason then was supplying two armies, that left him his Spiders of the Misty Mountains, led by Druzhag on a Spider. Andy had his forces of the Hill of Dark Sorcery, and I, then Men (and Bear) of the Wilderlands. There are few rules differences between my lists and the ones in the WOTR rulebook. Firstly, Elves do no suck. Secondly, all the Wraiths but the Witch-King aren't anything like as potent as they become later on (in the actual War of the Ring). Thirdly, we've tweaked the Spirit rules so that they are less vulnerable to bowfire (similar to elven cloaks), ALL spirit units can double, and it is easier for them to double through an enemy unit. How did we go? Well lucky Snorri, an impartial observer on secondment form the Red Fortress Ministry of Truth, saw the whole thing:

 I've gotten used to the shades, spirits and wraiths while serving alongside our fraternal allies in Morgoth-Sauronism in the cold real of Angmar. However, spiders. Thank Morgoth these spiders don't talk to you, like the ones from the Mirkwood sometimes do. Wierds me right out, all those eyes, and their mandibles move. Still, I'd take one over a stinking Elf any day of the week. It's a shame we also have to mow down the Men of the Wilderlands this day, but it's worth it to rid our lands of the lackey's of the Valar and Westronish pawns. The Dol Guldur commander is to keep his Orcs where they can't spoil things and use his most expensive cavalry to lead a chance on an uninterrupted line of Noldor Longbow. Should be over quickly.

It transpires that, despite the scientific benefits of our superior doctrine, volleys of Elven Longbow fire are the (second) death of cavalry. Despite the inevitability of our eventual victory over the Valar-Running-Dog-Lackeys, the fact we pretty much have all our cavalry in front of those Noldor Archers may be problematic.

The Elve's have some thick armour on them too. Thankfully, their boot-licking dupes amongst the men of Rhovanion are pathetically eager to join alongside them. So our elite 'Tower Orcs' cut the men down first and threw them back. Their retreat had the useful byproduct of trampling a few Noldor too.

 At this point, much strategising and planning went on amongst our brilliant commanders.

Meanwhile, some men of Esgaroth went off to fight some more Orcs lurking in a wood to the west of the battlefield. The orcs did not seem eager to join battle so the mercenaries of Lake Town drifted back to watch the action in the centre. They arrived in time to cheer the perfidy of their neighbours the woodsmen, who had been hiding out and waiting to ambush the spiders. The spiders call back derisive jeers as they made ready to skitter back and eat them all. Until the Woodsmen made them eat arrows instead. I'm sure the bow is a terror weapon that is certainly banned in the articles covering the conduct of decent warfare.

 However, despite our enemies' low trickery, the Witch-King's new pet project: his dread Castellans, had marched forward on our left and were proceeding to terrorise the Noldor Archers over there.

Also - archers are no match for another example of our military genius, spiders so small and numerous that arrows are no threat!

However, the clever minds that thought that one up will sadly have to be purged and sent to work the mines in Moria. What use are spiders so small that enemy cavalry ride over them with ease?

Clearly our Southern brethren in Morgoth-Leninism have fallen victim to malingerers, traitors, and infiltrators in their ranks. Even despite the inexorable advance of our new (and no doubt eventual war-winning) Castellan weapon, they somehow conspired to get boxed in, shot to pieces, then repeatedly charged to death by some Pasty archers from Rivendell, woodchoppers, and other lumpen like the mercenaries and huscarls, who are only in it for the coin.

Still, we have limitless reserves of Spiders (shudder); and looked at one way (the right way) massive casualties only provide more material for building more of our Spirit super-weapons. So let's call this a victory!

(Thanks for the great game guys. Four players is a blast.)