Monday, November 21, 2011

WOTR Batrep: Elvish Lackeys sneak attack the farms of Carn Dum

We knew it - Those slimy Elves were mixed up in the Rohavian bandit attack all along! Here they are, trying to sneak up on Ulfric's farmstead at dusk. They've developed a little more spine since they heard word that the Witch-King is TEMPORARILY indisposed but they still mince over the snow-drifts rather than wading through like a burly Carn Dum Huscarl. They may be planning on using their cats-eyes to strike from the gathering dark like the cowards they are... but the closing shadows can conceal other horrors than a Nazgul. The Wraiths have withdrawn to husband their forces (even with them a hundred leagues away, none dare call them cowards) but we can still spring some nasty surprises.

This was a 1000 pt WOTR clash (field of swords and shieldwalls) between the brave heroes of Carn Dum and the cowardly Elves. 

The Elves had brought Cirdan and Thranduil, at the head of a unit of High-Elven Cohort, a pair of units of Wood-Elven Archers and one units of Galadrim with Shields. 

In their turn, the current King of Carn Dum led three formations, five coy strong, of Carn Dum warriors. Two Cheiftains led a formation each. Another smaller unit of two Siege bows took up position to defend Ulfric's farm while Buhrdur lurked once more in ambush and a new threat, the winged serpent Gulhavar joined the counterattack on the Elves. We played this using houserules.

Somebody thought it a good idea to allow Elves to ignore shields with bowfire... 
Unfortunately, the slippery Elves were too quick for us this time and several of them slipped in quickly and got a volley of long-bow fire off at Wulfgar's warriors on the left flank. Morgoth's Balls! not an arrow found a shield and instead the arrows went unerringly to knew, knee and head. Near a dozen men fell right there. Worse, the cowards had some kind of cloak that hid them amongst the snow flurries and our own artillery was unable to make out any targets - be they Elven Archers or their blade armed confederates, skulking to their rear. However, our courage was the equal of a hundred Elven Archers and with hearty cries we marched the right flank forward to meet the invaders head-on.

The Elven player attempts to halt his doom with a hasty wall of dice.

And on we came. We seemed to be advancing considerably more slowly without Wraiths to give us wings but were committed to our 'plan'. Some would call us stupid, but is it stupid to march resolutely into the teeth of so many arrows that they block out what's left of the fast-dimming sun? No. Marching to certain death is bravery, not stupidity. After-all, who would want to admit to being afraid of a mincing Elf when quaffing mead back in the Red Fortress? True to type, the Elves played it 'cowardly as an Elf'. They exchanged martial pride for such useless advantages as elevation, initiative and a layered defense. Fools. More chicken-fletched arrows rained down and this time Huscarl's from the Kings' own men fell and littered the trail of our advance.

Yes, it is perfectly reasonable that those Warriors screen that flying monster...
The Elves used their low trickery again and got the jump on us. They made a double line of longbow on the hill and readied themselves  (that cowardly race naturally shies from the manly work of close-combat) to unleash yet more hen-feathered arrows in our direction. They had a problem though, we are a race of heroes and three whole formations of our men faced them, within spitting distance, across the snow. What's more. our secret weapon paced and flapped it's great wings irritably from behind the first-line. He had the scent of his dinner now. So we cheered, the Elves shot, then...

Wait, didn't that unit to the right of Gulhavar have five coy a moment ago?
...We charged. The spearhead had lost literally scores of brave, and not in anyway stupid, Carn Dum Warriors to Elven bowfire. However, The human wave has reached the Elven line. Look at this, I saw those Elven ponces smirking earlier but they weren't now. One, two units of warriors and Gulhavar have reached the first line and we think we are in for one Heroic Fight.When the girlish screams of the Elves had died down, there an empty gap in the Elven front and we were ready to send the Human wave to hit the second line.It is said that the Seer Cirdan has the gift of foresight but what ever he foresaw left him paralyzed and soiling his whites as we laid into them all.
Something in Gulhavar's lizard brain sent him off in the wrong direction!

More Elven trickery was in store for us though.Some hedge Wizard named Thranduil managed to whisper in Gulhavar's ear and REALLY panic him. Curses, he'll be out for the fight for this round. We can take them though. Some of the wimps were hiding in a nearby ruin but their position was given away by their wailing and caterwauling as they realised that an obviously hungry Buhrdur shared their locale and had sniffed them out. 

We could safely ignore those fools and send what were still three whole formations of warriors to eliminate the two formations of Elves that faced them. I don't think their bows will be saving them now...
All together now!
The lads were obviously feeling their oats today. Sometimes, a lingering fear of getting too close to those odd-smelling (they call it a bath, whatever that is, sounds bad) Elves will cause the odd Huscarl to hesitate in the charge. Not this time though. The (totally elected on basis of merit) King signaled airily, the Chieftains gave the should to go, and the people's army of the Carn Dum plateau surged in as one. Lacking shields, another formation of Elves was quickly eliminated by first one, then another combined charge.
Look who's back.
The warriors of Carn Dum were tired. We have the stamina of oxes but killing all those Elves gets tiring if you have to do it turn after turn. So we let them go first, while we took a breather. They shuffled about a bit but look what's happened: Everywhere you look there are warriors and monsters. So the remaining Elves offered their surrender. 

We'd have taken it too........were we stupid. No, we weren't letting any of them slink off the woods to breed and foment more bandit uprisings.  Looks like Ulfric's farm is safe, wonder how his mead-cellar is looking. 

Cheers for the great game, Jason. Looking forward to the rematch. I initially thought there was too much bow in your list but I think the real issue was that you sat back and let me set up a massed charge. You need to get stuck in and chew me up a bit at a time. Still, those were some pretty horrendous Carn Dum casualty figures. The human wave very nearly faltered... 

Thanks for reading. 

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